BARB gets Buzzed: Vibrator Reviews by Amy Gall

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Your Hand Held Happy Toys: Reviews by Amy Gall

It’s winter, so, having sex with other humans means braving biting winds, snow, and the G train, so I was excited to test drive Adam and Eve’s Black Magic G Silicone Massager and Perfect Rotating Rabbit.

In general, I find battery operated vibrators aren’t as powerful as rechargeable or plug-in ones and this proved to be true with both Black Magic and the Rabbit.  And while both toys boasted 10 separate vibration functions, any setting other than uninterrupted vibration made me feel less like I was trying to bring myself to orgasm and more like I was missing a call on my cell phone.

The Black Magic g-spot vibrator was easy to hold and the shaft was soft enough that adjusting the angle of it inside me felt fine, but even the highest setting on the vibrator barely registered. Women cum from g-spot stimulation in all different ways and I personally need consistent, fast penetration.  But even when I turned Black Magic into, essentially a vibrating dildo, I still didn’t orgasm as the shaft wasn’t thick enough. All in all, a less than “magical” experience.

The Rotating Rabbit was a nonstarter. Even when the shaft was in to the hilt, the vibrating rabbit head didn’t reach my clit. At best, I felt a whispering breeze generated by the little rabbit ears at the top of the head, but, I couldn’t come from that. The shaft itself was thick enough and it rotated as well as vibrated, but the turning action actually made my attempts at manual penetration painful and unlike the g-spot vibrator, the rabbit is straight as a ruler and it missed my g-spot.

Sadly, my sexual hibernation was short lived.  Oh well, back to Tinder.

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Amy Gall‘s fiction, essays and interviews have appeared in Tin House, Vice, Guernica, Brooklyn Magazine, PANKJoyland and The Los Angeles Review of Books, among others.  You can see more of her work at amygall.com
For these and all sex toys, go to AdamandEve.com
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