Monday BARB UP October 16, 2017.

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My daughter wrote a book, Earth Hates Me. Please own it. Here.

Both my child and I have been faced with a predator. Me, later in my life, when I was a fully realized and empowered woman, and she in sixth, then eighth grade. The flame of power not even an ember. My child, aged eleven. Home after school with three classmates. I had been home all day, not feeling well. The advent of my relationship with migraines, still not accustomed was I to managing the pain; it would debilitate me for hours as it happened on this day. My child, then known as the Tween, came home with three of her friends, all male. One is our neighbor, and remains her best friend to this day. The other was his best friend at school and the third, C., was just this kid. I’d never met him before. All three boys had been her classmates at her intimate middle school since fifth grade. I’d heard C’s name, innocuous. I rolled around in my bed while the kids dived off my couch, played with the gamebox thing. The Tween walked the dog and came home, alarmed. He’d peed blood. Rocky the Pug was only two years old then. I called the vet. Was told to bring him in. As I left, I told the kids to be careful. I turned to C., and said, “You, I don’t know. Behave.” He sat on my blue birthing ball, eyes big, brown, innocent. I was gone 45 minutes. In that time, while the Tween sat on the couch, the boys diving onto the bean bags, this child C., this eleven year old boy, pinned the Tween down and grinded on her body. She fought him off. Her two friends were paralyzed; I’d guess they’d never witnessed this before, were frightened. When I came home with Rocky, the boys were gone and the Tween was in her room. I was not informed. The following week, the same four kids were hanging out, this time in our neighbor’s home. The kids were in the boys’ bedroom. The mom was in the kitchen. The Tween was sitting on the neighbor’s bed, looking at her phone when C. jumped on her, intention clear. This time, the other two boys pulled him off. This time, the Tween left immediately. Still, I had no idea this occurred. A few days later, the Tween was home alone. C. was at the door, finger pressed on the doorbell. This time, she told him to go away. Months later, I received a call from the Principal of the school. There’d been an incident involving C. And the neighbor’s best friend, in an emotional moment, told the administration about the incident in my apartment. C. was only 11 and already ingrained in him was the tendency towards sexual harassment. He was a predator. And he had no power, he was still but a child and yet, he behaved. He acted as a man empowered. Later, his mother pointed her finger at the girls in the school, asking for it. I understood then; that what C. was missing was education, the kind that included Not Being Rape-y. Me Too, for me, is Me Too Squared. Not simply me. But already my child.

Me Too.

Tell your story. Tell it to me if you want. Also, reporting.

Hillary: “There seems now to be a willingness by more and more women and girls to claim their rights in a very explicit way, not an apologetic way. Not like, ‘Oh, you know, excuse me, let me express my opinion,’ but ‘No, I have an opinion. I want to tell you what that opinion is.'”

Nikole Hannah-Jones: “My focus is trying to expose the way that racial inequality is maintained through official policy and action. I write about segregation and racial injustice, but I don’t just write that it exists — I try to expose how it happens.”

Amy Tan: ““Liberal” is not a nasty word. I wish “liberal” could be changed to “compassionate,” meaning we share responsibility; we share pain; we share in our flaws; we share in the ways we’re destroying the environment but want to make amends.”

Roxane Gay and Channing Tatum. Oh, yes.

I’m super into Larry Flynt and his 10 million right now.

How much power do we have, state-wise, over our birth control?

Tinder tips.

And now have a laugh with Nikki Glaser.



Hurricane Maria Support.

Puerto Rico has been devastated by the recent hurricanes. Your help is needed.

The Maria Fund. “One hundred percent of monies raised will be used to support immediate relief, recovery, and equitable rebuilding in Puerto Rico for the communities hit hardest by the storm.”

Operation Puerto Rico Care-Lift: “The island has been devastated by two back to back Hurricanes in two weeks and has lost 100 percent of its power grid. This disaster happens on the heals of over 10 years of severe economic recession and hardship. And frankly, most people don’t have a way off this Island.” Lara Richardson & Chris Sloan

Support The Girls. Always an advocate for women in need, Dana Marlowe’s set up a donation for Puerto Rican women and girls.

Unidos. “100% of your gift to UNIDOS goes to help children, friends and families recover from the devastation caused by Hurricane Maria and the Mexico City earthquake.”

Unidos Por Aguadilla.  “That’s why we concerned about our towns of Aguadilla and Yauco , where we were born and raised, are creating this fund to funnel 100% of the resources directly to help  the families in need on the West coast of Puerto Rico. ” (Samy Nemir & Hedmanuel Soto)

Unidos Puerto Rico. “United for Puerto Rico is an initiative brought forth by the First lady of Puerto Rico, Beatriz Rosselló in collaboration with the private sector, with the purpose of providing aid and support to those affected in Puerto Rico by the passage of Hurricane Irma and Hurricane María.”



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