Tuesday BARB UP April 16, 2019

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In the wake of the fire at Notre-Dame burning, I decided not to write something reflective, but to repost.

It takes a lot of work being nice. Last year, I spoke to a room filled with college students. I told them if there was one professional  gift I could give them, it would be this: Be nice to everyone. Yes, I said thatThe power of being nice a magical trait you can carry with you along for the rest of your career. And by nice, I mean agreeable, amiable, willing. I don’t mean you need to bland-ify yourself, lose your edge, not embrace your quirky and relatable side. I mean, being nice. When your idiot boss is barking at you to order a tuna sandwich, not another egg salad sandwich, sure think your thoughts, but keep the smize in your eyes, listen actively, and do as your supervisor says. This is not the time to prove a point, to slam your coffee mug on the floor and say, “You suck!” That right there, would be burning a bridge. which haunts you throughout your career that you’re difficult, not good to work with, etc. People remember you when you voice your opinion on a project, people remember the ideas that go viral, people remember those of us who make a mark, as long as they aren’t rude about it, aren’t assholes about it, aren’t taking credit for other people’s work. Well, okay fine, you do remember the jerks, the people who stab each other in the back, the people who take credit for your work. But. Those who are nice? Well, nice goes a long way. Nice informs the people who work around you an insight to your character. That you will be a person they can rely on. That you will be a person they will hire again. That you are nice. Nice isn’t bland. Nice is cache. Nice is a stamp of approval that pays for itself. And if you practice being nice early in your professional life, it becomes a part of your personal make up, your actual being; it’s no longer a put on, but part of you. And how nice would that be? The college students, full of passion and vigor, doubted me at first. “I need to speak my truth!” “What about my voice?” But as I pointed out examples of not being nice—unreturned calls, ignored emails, being short with others—that follow a person along their career, they soon started to agree with me. They started to see that being nice isn’t about tamping down who you are, it’s the little things that lead to the big things. So when a coffee cup is being thrown at you, you don’t throw one back, you go to Human Resources. If your supervisor is yelling at you, you don’t yell back, you note it for your records, a remind on how not to behave ever. Being a jerk is easy; being nice is work, and as we continue to work on ourselves, we ought to add being nice to that list of things to aspire to.  I encouraged the students to stay true to nice. As I do to everyone, and in particular, myself.

RIP Georgia Engel.

Stacey Abrams: “People who’ve known me my whole life, especially my political life, said, “Well, you shouldn’t run for governor, because they’re going to find out you don’t have money and you have these debts.” My answer was, “You think I’m not worthy of this job that you’ve pushed me to run for years because I have credit-card debt and tax debt?””

Laurie Metcalf is a legend. Tis all.

Melinda Gates: “I have to think about where my voice will help the conversation and where will it hurt. So for today, I have chosen to raise my voice in favor of contraceptives. ”

Paris, Mon Amour.

Some things you can do with money.

Life with a hip fracture.

The recall of the Rock n Play.

And now have a laugh with Rosebud Baker.


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