The great misnomer of Feminism is not that Women Hate Men (come on Megyn Kelly, you’re smarter than that to believe that’s what the F-word means); no, for me, the great misnomer about Feminism is that it will solve all the ills that befall women. In reading article after article by women and men, critiquing the great swell of the Women’s March, or how feminism has failed us or oh yes, that time we decided as a global entity to wear pink hats and reclaim the word “pussy” or that any of the aforementioned were simply a marketing ploy, the overarching theme is: Is this what Feminism has wrought you?

Men, in their dating manuals, call this “negging.”

One Women’s March is not going to solve the overarching issues of pay gap, misogyny, intersectionality. It’s going to take an ongoing effort on the part of every willing human being to affect change. Your interpretation of the definition of feminism—and the definition can very depending on which dictionary you read or what search engine you use—allows you to have an informed opinion of whether you are a feminist or not. In this very sweet video, a 7 year-old explains (to Amy Poehler) what a feminist is, and to this day and for me, it is interpretation of the word I abide by: that girls and boys are of equal value.

If you want all the ills in the world of women to be solved, you’ll be sorely disappointed. Being a Feminist won’t come into play when you burn the toast. Being a Feminist won’t matter when the Object of Your Affection doesn’t call you like she/he said she/he would. Being a Feminist won’t bear the responsibility if you can’t tear yourself away from Leah Remini’s Scientology show on A&E. But. Being a Feminist will thrust you to run for office, because you know it’s possible, because other women have done so before you, and will do so after you. Being a Feminist opens your eyes to your indignation when a stranger tells you to smile, to know that you can decide what to do with your body, what lipstick to apply to your lips, what you feel like when you watch a Woody Allen movie. Being a Feminist comes into play when a hiring manager can see that you are of equal value to the male applying for the same job. Being a Feminist begins at your core. And from within, you begin to chip away at the bigger picture.

If you would like to affect change for women, pick an issue: “ERA. Pro-choice. Funding for breast/cervical cancer screenings/research. Domestic violence. Sexual abuse. Mean girl-ism. The male gaze. The glass ceiling. Women’s health care. Pre-natal, post, all of it. WIC. Subsidized child care. Education. Employment. Social security. Women in government. Women in the sex industry. Stay-at-home women.” Or whatever cause you feel best suited for, most interested in. And tackle it. Make the change happen.

Just please don’t sit back and shake your head at us. Because we’re fighting for our lives and we need you, everyone of you. Women and men.

Oh, I don’t just Think I Love You. I do, I do. David Cassidy, heartthrob of my tweendom, has dementia.

The women at Standing Rock have a gift for you. Note that today at 2pm, life as they know it, changes.

Christy Hazen circa 2012: “So there’s an awareness and there’s a lack of awareness. I think this is extremely fascinating. Leading into the last election there was a clear division in women in the US regarding women’s rights. It seemed to be caused by political or religious beliefs, which is mind blowing because the rights of women aren’t a topic or subject for debate, they are a fundamental right of a human being. Feminism is a voice, it’s support, it’s a call to action, it’s a safe place, it’s reassurance, it’s a message, it’s a reminder, it’s progress, it’s awareness, it’s education and it’s unity. I’m grateful for this interview because it calls attention to the lack of awareness. Feminism is like art or literature, it makes the world prettier and isn’t something that you can debate. It should never be something that has a lack of awareness. It’s something that just IS. It should always be relevant. People, not just women, should always be aware of it.”

Oh the Oscars are almost here. And so, if you are at all interested in a feminist unpacking of the latest Fifty Shades movie, here you go.

Ever wonder what the difference between your clear, your yellow and your green slime coming out of your nose is?

Say goodbye to your neck-hurting-while-on-a-plane!

And now have a laugh with Carol Leifer.